your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
dude i'm inner monologue high
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize