hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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