im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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