I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize