So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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