This is not my ceiling
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
