just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
