no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
