happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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