My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize