So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
