my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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