I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
And then he peed in my hair
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