Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
being pregnant is like rehab
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
