i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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