her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
