He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
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