Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
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