Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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