No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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