Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize