Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

Bea Arthur died yesterday

(240): View more from Maryland

You shut your stupid mouth

(301): View more from Maryland

Betty White is next, I just know it.

(240): View more from Maryland

Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.

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(301): Bea Arthur died yesterday (240): You shut your stupid mouth (301): Betty White is next, I just know it. (240): Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next. http://tfl.nu/xn02

Replies (20) Good night (1060) Bad night (484)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.

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(201): i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures. http://tfl.nu/5w6x

Replies (16) Good night (596) Bad night (5514) Order T-Shirt
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(347): View more from New York

k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza

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(347): k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza http://tfl.nu/rg2w

Replies (31) Good night (911) Bad night (5138) Order T-Shirt
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(727): View more from Florida

I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class

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(727): I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class http://tfl.nu/b4xz

Replies (49) Good night (5326) Bad night (794) Order T-Shirt
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(901): View more from Tennessee

How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?

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(901): How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games? http://tfl.nu/94zu

Replies (14) Good night (4186) Bad night (693) Order T-Shirt
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito

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(617): i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito http://tfl.nu/zxd0

Replies (3) Good night (1557) Bad night (1434) Order T-Shirt
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(587): View more from Alberta

The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.

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(587): The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll. http://tfl.nu/pn3x

Replies (19) Good night (2643) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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(505): View more from New Mexico

You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"

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(505): You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex" http://tfl.nu/srnr

Replies (4) Good night (1416) Bad night (411)
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(602): View more from Arizona

JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.

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(602): JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS. http://tfl.nu/m8yh

Replies (10) Good night (1265) Bad night (663) Order T-Shirt
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(334): View more from Alabama

It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!

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(334): It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas! http://tfl.nu/ak8o

Replies (1) Good night (1015) Bad night (658) Order T-Shirt
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(727): View more from Florida

Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?

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(727): Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots? http://tfl.nu/ihjx

Replies (4) Good night (1847) Bad night (488) Order T-Shirt
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(518): View more from New York

It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.

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(518): It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips. http://tfl.nu/uv9b

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(502): View more from Kentucky

got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.

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(502): got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood. http://tfl.nu/bzvq

Replies (8) Good night (1307) Bad night (436)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.

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(732): My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally. http://tfl.nu/1mf9

Replies (3) Good night (904) Bad night (424) Order T-Shirt
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(904): View more from Florida

My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.

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(904): My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy. http://tfl.nu/l9z4

Replies (19) Good night (3084) Bad night (481) Order T-Shirt

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