"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
