Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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