He is an equal opportunity slut.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
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