I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
