I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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