Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I just found a bag of teeth...
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
