Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
We left an ass print on the piano.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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