So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
