You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Another day, another engagement, another cat
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
