Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Actions speak louder than pants.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize