Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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