why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
