I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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