Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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