Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
