okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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