i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
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