And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
