Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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