I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
