I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize