I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
