i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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