We're facebook friends in real life
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
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