I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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