So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
