On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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