If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
