She just used a chaser for red wine.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something