great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
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