i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
